i love this guy's writing, but I surely shouldn't have eaten lunch before doing so...

hey, we all have our kinks. that's cool, whatever floats your boat... just hope it don't end up killing you.

grossing people out is an artform, telling such stories and making them sound believable is good preparation for becoming a lawyer.

i think i'm gonna run and throw out all the carrots in my kitchen before my little bro gets any ideas