100 reasons why its great to be a guy

[redcat]

102. Happiness can be bought in the form of a portable electronics device.

Oooh. It has buttons and blinking lights! I must buy it!

you scared me for a sec with this one.

[Raven]

See Assassin, this is why you're forced to go to theme parkes with faceless women - 'coz you follow the list so closely! I think the list is (mostly) false and my women always have faces. Gotta be something in that.

[Board of Command]

My eyes are bleeding

[Death BOO Z]

heck, some lists about chuck norris facts, someone sent my brother the link, enjoy, or get roundhouse kick to the face.

# When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

# Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

# There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.

# Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.

# Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

# Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

# Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

# Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

# There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.

# When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.

# Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.

# Chuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.

# There is no such thing as global warming. Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up.

# Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.

# Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.

# Chuck Norris gave Mona Lisa that smile.

# Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

# Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost

# Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.

# Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.


get full list at www.chucknorrisfacts.com ... there are tons of good ones..

[Lucifus]

Rofl. Those own. Not into to Chuck Norris jokes but that was gold.

"# Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants."

[Board of Command]

In a recent vote, it was decided that the #1 Chuck Norris fact is:

Chuck Norris's tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

[samsonlonghair]

Fifteen years ago they told those exact same jokes (and better ones) with Mr. T in place of Chuck Norris.

For instance:

Mr. T. does not break wind. He destroys it.

Mr. T puts the laughter in manslaughter.

Mr. T once bit off more than he could chew. He ate it anyway.

Mr. T speaks only when necessary. His main form of communication is folding his arms and slowly shaking his head. And regardless of the situation, he is always understood.

On the A-team, Face , Haniabal, and Murdoch were all masters of disguise. Mr T didn’t have to wear a disguise. The bad guys didn’t recognize him out of fear.

There are only three horsemen of the apocalypse, because Mr. T is going to walk.

Despite popular belief, Mr. T in fact ended the civil rights movement by getting on a bus….all caucasian people moved to the back.

Mr. T does not have to kick the crap out of you, crap runs out of your ass in fright when you come into contact with Mr. T.

Mr. T is not black. It’s just that the sun is to afraid to shine on him.