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Tue, 11-22-2011, 06:54 PM
#11
I'm against spanking/beating as a form of discipline. I can barely discipline a dog. I feel guilty as fuck when i get an outburst and lash the dog with the leash even though it wasn't really that hard and the thick fur probably absorbed everything. I believe that the most you should go too is to grab the childs shoulders, raise your voice and give him a firm shake, not talking about some aggressive shake that leaves neck injury as is reported every now and then, but a firm one that lets the child know it's serious business. It should get that shock effect that stops the child in his tracks, and then you can start talking to the child. And this is of course only for when the child is out of control and won't listen and just screams or/and runs around. And if this doesn't help, in my opinion it's the parents that has failed to begin with. Because if the child don't respond to even that he has been sugar coated to much that he is used to be able to do whatever he wants that he don't even take that serious.
You have to establish your dominance/authority from an early point in life so the child knows that when you raise your voice, playtime is over and it's time to start listen to the "authority". And this is doable without violence if done from early age. It only works if the child is raised to realize the severity of the situation when the parent raises the voice and/or grabbing the shoulders. I get the feeling these demon children you see have from the beginning never been disciplined. At least not from the start. I bet that when they threw their temper tantrums their parents just caved in and let them continue their bad behavior, or bribed/rewarded them with an ice cream to get them quiet. And then when they got older and they are really out of control nothing will work on them because they are the authority. All they need to do is scream and throw a temper tantrum. And if you finally start to stand up for yourself and not cave in they have learned that they are the boss of the house and will just step their game up by maybe even get violent. And violence might be the solution to establish the dominance/authority but does that sound right? Should the child suffer physical punishment just because the parent failed to begin with? If this is the solution then in my opinion the parent should go out to the street and get someone to physically punish them for their failure too. Because to me this is like you feeding your child crack for years and then suddenly you realize the error of your way and stop, and every time the child screams you "correct" it by giving it a spanking.
Also i find it that parents that feel the need to spank or beat their children or just thinks this is good and justified parenting usually use this type for everything. Not only when things go to far. Child slaps a sibling? Spanking time! Child breaks something? Spanking time! Child don't wanna go to sleep? Spanking time! As soon as the child don't do something that pleases the parent or don't do something the parent agrees on it's spanking time.
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